Sisters: unlikely friends

I've logged hundreds of miles over the last few weeks attending to family matters. Yesterday the round trip took the better part of a day, but I didn't mind. I was traveling with a sister. We filled the hours discussing matters of great consequence (primarily my father's health) and matters of no consequence at all (like hair color). It wasn't until we delved into memories from our childhood, however, that I saw our close relationship as an unlikely blessing.

Let me back up. I've always seen my older sister as a blessing in my life. This sis is the one took me to the public library and helped me check out my first book, “Alice in Wonderland.” She's shown limitless patience and forgiveness over the years ... although she does keep reminding me of the time I dismantled her toy drum. But I say our relationship is unlikely because we are so incredibly different.

As the miles passed under our wheels the other day, my sister described how from a very young age she knew she would become a professional woman, a lawyer or doctor. (This in a home where “women's lib” was derided.) In contrast, I was the child who was determined, by age five, to never grow up. “They can't make me,” I reasoned.

My eldest sibling was serious and studious, while I might best be described as ... well ... not. Where she was thoughtful, I was a goofball. Where I was flighty, she was unshakeable.

These days we're moving somewhat closer in disposition and ideology. I've discovered that she has a creative side and I have a practical side. She has the capacity for whimsy and I, self-discipline. Still, our personalities are polar opposites.

In spite of our differences, though, (or is it because of them?) we are not only sisters, but good friends. Who else could understand my affinity for retro? And comprehend why, now in my forties, I'm still really a kid.

How do you relate to your siblings? Are you more alike or different? In what ways do your differences impact your relationship?

Comments

[Brenda]

Titania, I have to admit that, like you, my relationship with my brother (the baby of the family) is not close either. And maybe that's one of the things that makes the bond with my sisters even more special. Still, I cannot imagine not knowing whether he was alive or in jail. I have hope, however, and (like you) still do what I can to keep in touch. Maybe someday ...

[Titania]

It is truly a blessing that you have maintained a special relationship with your sister.

I am the oldest and have a younger brother. I was the studious serious one and he was always the troublemaker. So bad that he did follow the wrong path for awhile.This caused us to grow apart. We lost contact and now maybe speak to each other once a year. I am grateful for that little bit of time. There were times that I wondered where he was at, if he was alive or in jail. I always invite him to come and visit me and to stay in touch. But he doesn't. I will never stop loving my little brother though we have went our separate ways.

[Brenda]

Thanks to everyone who has stopped by and commented!

I should have mentioned that I also have a younger sister whom I treasure just as much, but for different reasons. I'll have to write about her at another point.

Much like Haizum commented here, I've long said that I'm very lucky in the fact that my sisters are like best friends ... and my best friends are like sisters.

But it's nice to see that everyone commenting here acknowledges a special connection with a sister. And I'm so glad that Bernie followed up with a post on his own site about the evolving relationship with his sis. Here's the link if anyone would like to check it out: http://bernie-f-f-fiftysomething.blogspot.com/2008/04/siblings.html

[Bernie]

Great post (it inspired one on my blog too). I believed for most of my adult life that my sister and I were so UNalike that maybe we were from different planets. But we grew much closer during the past few years and now look at each other as friends as much as siblings. It is a great transformation and discovery.

[Haizum]

I think I'm very lucky to have siblings who are my family AND friends. Not everybody's born into a family that they both love and like. :D I like em. I'll keep em. *chuckle*

[Stepherz]

This is a fantastic post. Having a sister is such a blessing. My sister is 11 years younger than me (21 years old), so we often find it hard to relate to one another. We're just in different places. But there is and always will be a very neat connection there.

Thanks for visiting today!

[Stepherz]

This is a fantastic post. Having a sister is such a blessing. My sister is 11 years younger than me (21 years old), so we often find it hard to relate to one another. We're just in different places. But there is and always will be a very neat connection there.

Thanks for visiting today!

[SF Girl]

Good post, Brenda! My sister and I are pretty different too. I'm the youngest, by two years. We are very much like you and your sister too! Funny that!

[MoonSage]

Hello. You came by my site and I knew I needed to come by here and see what you're up to here and TADA! I think we might have much to talk about.

I can't wait to respond to the post but in actuality, I have to wait as I'm sick and much overdue for a nap. (smiling here at the absurdity of what I just said)

Thanks for coming by and I do hope to see more of you and get to know you a bit in the process.

Wishing you (all), peace, love and understanding.